9/7/09 Leaving America

From my journal:

9/7 6:20pm California Time

Words are failing me.

And you know how rare that is for me.

But the past week...

I am overwhelmed.

It doesn't help that it's 2 or 3 am where I'm headed, and it already feels like it. I've done well on jet lag this week - the sleep deprivation approach works - but I haven't slept particularly well - or long - most nights this week, plus there's the emotional upheaval of seeing-so-many-loved-ones-then-having-them-snatched-away-for-another-nine-months.

Just a little taste of America - the real America, the land of friends and family and decades of memories, not to be confused with the dizzying, snarling, ugly consumerism I glimpsed in CostCo and Macy's and on billboards across the Bay Area - there's something wrong with you, something truly awful and unworthy, but if you spend a lot of money, maybe you can hide it just a little longer - just enough of a taste to be reminded of what I don't get anymore.

America Heroin: First Hit's Free.